Things to Avoid While Using a Dating App

 Swipe, match, chat - and go on. If that sounds like your experience on a dating app, you're not alone - dating app fatigue is a real thing, particularly when you're in your late 20s or early 30s. The apps have made many updates for the better, but the men on them? They may need to boot camp some game. If you are looking for love, lust or anything in between, it is time to say "no more" to these online dating faux pas. You can change how you date on these apps. Let's dive into what the world of dating apps which are needs to avoid.

1. Neglecting the Bio Section Entirely

• The Problem

Omitting your bio altogether, or including a pointless one-liner like "just ask," is a lost opportunity. While the bios section can be intimidating to fill out, it is appropriate to relay some information in your bio beyond your profile photos. The bio, in a lot of cases, could be interpreted as you being disengaged or lazy-explaining who you are with reliance on your profile photos. 

• The Solution

Engage with Figure something out that excites you, motivates you to interact with stubby, and share a few original details about you that others can latch onto, such as " a weekend adventurer who loves to discover hole-in-the-wall pizza joints. Just ask me about the time I got lost in Italy! This is a much more interesting and amiable bio. This reveals something about your life, in addition to a respectful, graceful manner, and gives an easy conversation starter.

2. Not Being Specific Enough

• The Problem

It may be common for people to make their profiles too vague.  For example, a bio like, "I like music, movies, and having fun," might be a good start, but it doesn't tell the person anything specific about you. People often choose to remain vague because they want to appeal to everyone, or they are afraid of being too specific and missing out on a match.  However, by being vague, you make your profile generic or forgettable, and without some specific detail about yourself, it becomes difficult for others to engage with you or find a specific conversation starter.

• The Solution

To remedy this, be specific and bring out the characteristics that make you unique.  For example, instead of being vague and saying something else, use some specificity - "I'm always looking for live jazz shows and can't go a week without watching a Wes Anderson movie." Not only does this give others more information about your interests, but it also encourages those who may share similar interests to have a conversation in the first place.  Specificity is crucial. Remember, the more specific you can be, the more likely you'll get good matches.

3. Using Overly Edited Photos

• The Problem

The photos that appear in your profile may be even more important than your bio. Relying on selfies, filtered images, or group photos where it isn't clear who you are can create confusion. Many people fall prey to the habitual use of heavily edited or old photos in the name of presenting their "best self," but this attitude often can make you appear unapproachable, and possibly inauthentic. 

• The Solution 

Your photographs create your first impression, but also, without question, the ability to share a story about who you are, portraying your most authentic self. Use a range of photographs in your profile to have a balanced and welcoming effect. One good photo mix is a smiling headshot, a spontaneous shot of you partaking in some sort of physical activity and one of you doing something related to your hobby. All of these photos provide potential matches with glimpses into your personality and life, making you appear more relatable and where people will feel less intimidated to reach out to you.

4. Listing Too Many Requirements

• The Problem

While wanting to weed out potential incompatibilities is perfectly understandable, potentially having too many requirements and in a negative tone can be problematic. Bios like, "don't message me if you're lazy, a smoker, or can't handle sarcasm," come across as angry and judgmental. While it is good to establish limitations for yourself, the negative focus on “don'ts” creates a negative first impression about you and may turn away people who may have otherwise been a good match. Positive bios state your desire to meet someone and convey what you want.

 

• The Solution

A better alternative might be, "I am looking for someone who loves road trips and being a little spontaneous." This focuses on what you want and establishes your values in a friendly way that is inviting, allowing others to see if they fit with your outlook. Additionally, focusing on green flags with a date will prepare you for the Food and Drink Fun Foursome and allow you to look forward to all of the wonderful things that you saw in their profile instead of dreading the few drawbacks that were not quite right.

Conclusion

Steering clear of these mistakes on dating apps can set you up for success and give you the ability to make a great first impression and a meaningful relationship. From helpful photos of yourself, a standout bio, and taking the time to make a thoughtful conversation, it's all in the details.